A trip to a local supermarket today (which shall remain anonymous as I am so ashamed that I crossed its portal. I know I shouldn't support them but it was the only place convenient for what I wanted today - honest.) and, after checking-out my necessary but treacherous items, I saw that there was an in-store Costa franchise (Another one! They are popping up like an infection all over the place). I couldn't help but notice that the 'proud to serve Costa' proclamation was not on display. Why, thought I? I just had to find out.
Of a young lad in a uniform I enquired: "good morrow, bright-eyed barista chappie, pray tell me why you do not tell the world that you are proud to serve Costa". Inwardly I was hoping his response would be along the lines of "coz we ain't, mate. Why don't you get orff outta yer". His reply, after he'd had time to consider my question, was more civil than I probably deserved: "I dunno. I'll arsk me boss" and off he went to arsk his boss. And arsk his boss he did. I saw him do it and I saw the strange looks they cast in my direction. After arsking his boss, he came back and told me: "she dunno either. Best get on our website and arsk Head Orffice". Well, as I can't be arsed to arsk Head Office, I'll never know why the Groves Green branch of Tesco's (doh!) appears not to be 'proud to serve Costa'. And I'm probably the only person in the world who cared.
A Sunday afternoon trip to Leeds Castle followed by a visit to their Costa-franchised coffee shop. "Proud to serve Costa" was their claim. To be accurate, the signs should have read "supremely indifferent to serve Costa" or "can't be arsed to be civil serving Costa". Rather perversely, I quite enjoy seeing people not buying into corporate hogwash. Long may they retain their distain for empty slogans.
Whilst on the subject of coffee chains, is it just me who is irritated by the Starbucks slogan “We proudly serve Starbucks coffee”? The use of that adverb annoys me. Not just because it’s grammatically rather clumsy, but because it also attaches the pride to the service and not the Starbucks coffee – which I don’t think is the intention. Why can't they employ literate copywriters? You know what? I think I'll boycott their coffee shops in protest. Ooops, as a non-coffee drinker, I do that already.
