How to be a parent - a grandparent's view

A friend posted on Facebook a link to a website and an entry entitled "How to be a Parent" (you can find it here). It gives a series of amusing pictorial 'do's and don'ts' for parents (aspiring and actual, I presume). Some I agree with: others I don't. Having contributed to the raising of two children and currently going through the joys of grand parenthood, I reckon I have enough battle-honed experience to offer valid comments on some of the entries.

Everyone knows that babies should be lifted by their ears. That's why they stick out so much.

Using a wristwatch to time the drying cycle is a no no. Best use the timer on the machine itself as you might wander off for a drink and forget that the baby is in it. After all, safety first when it comes to babies.

The chap on the right is doing it all wrong. What about lower body strength? A top heavy toddler is not a pretty sight so provide exercise for those chubby little legs.

Quite right too: putting them in the body of the trolley means that they get free access to all the food. Leave them chained up outside the supermarket by the dog bowl - that way they get a drink as well..

Best done with the thumbs at the back of the head and with your little fingers pulling the mouth into shape.

What sort of man puts a baby in a fish tank without a snorkel? Remember: safety first.

An eminently practical solution to the problem and it's only bad if you do it with cold water. Oh yes, make sure that the bowl has holes at the bottom to allow the water to run out.

A walk in the Duchy Woods: November 15th 2013

A walk in the nearby Duchy Woods down at Broad Mill Ford with two of our three grandsons today. Throwing stones in the stream, splashing in puddles and generally getting wet and muddy. The boys enjoyed it as well.

There were lots of these fungi growing in the leaf mould under the trees. I think they are Tubaria hiemalis (Winter Twiglet), apparently one of the more common species which grows from September to February. And before you ask – no, it’s not edible! Not poisonous, but simply tastes bad. A shame because it wouldn't take long to fill a bucket with them.

The trees laden with moss and lichen give a good indication of the prevailing climate in this part of the world - damp and relatively mild.

Hard to believe that this view incorporates mining evidence dating from the 1300s (the flat floor of the valley due to early tin streaming) to the late 1800s (the 'line' seen running across the photograph above the stream is the course of an old leat carrying water to power wheels for various mechanical processes). All gone now and the sites reclaimed by nature.

One small boy. One large puddle. Fun.

Who needs TV and computer games?

Especially when there's Dingle's Fairground Museum close to hand? That's where I went yesterday with my IBC and our two grand-daughters. Dodgems, Ghost Train, Waltzer, Distorting Mirrors, Hook-a-Duck and other old-fashioned fairground attractions, followed by a picnic of enormous proportions. A good day was had by young and adults alike.

Thankfully everything there is as it was with no over-burdening restrictions caused by modern Health and Safety regulations. Not that the rides were unsafe, they just had that edge of uncertainty that made them more exciting. They are completely different to anything that the modern child routinely encounters and our two loved them. Long may Dingle's continue!