Monday, 28 January 2013
Some suggestions for dealing with the feckless
Why should we support the feckless, lazy and irresponsible? How can we help them change their ways and become more responsible members of society? Here are a few suggestions:
Break up their vicious criminal gangs by arresting the ringleaders and locking them up. Perhaps starting with those attending the World Economic Forum.
Provide parenting classes for the feral rich to teach them social values and respect for others that they can pass on to their offspring.
Move them out of their overvalued ghettos in the centres of the world's capitals. Turn over the properties they own but rarely occupy to public use and social housing.
Crime and Rehab
Crack down on repeat climate-crime offenders by confiscating their luxury cars and private jets. Rehabilitate persistent offenders by teaching them how to walk and use public transport.
Wean the work-shy off the benefits of unearned profit. Break trust-fund dependence. Get undeserving recipients on to work experience schemes.
Use 'tough love' to deal with those who engage in risky behaviour, who gamble, cheat and deceive and then expect the public to bail them out of trouble. Ground them, tag them and ban them from using the internet to vandalize the global economy.
Target contraception towards problem families with morbidly obese carbon footprints fuelled by irresponsible lifestyles.
Get them to clear up after themselves. Remember Bhopal? Gulf of Mexico? Niger Delta?
Teach them to start paying their own way. Lesson #1: Pay your tax. Just because tax avoidance is legal, it doesn't mean it's not morally reprehensible.
Get overpaid execs who helped themselves to bonuses from bailed-out banks and businesses to face the victims of their crime and repay the money they owe.