'Tis the nightmare before Christmas....

The season is approaching, folks, when we curmudgeons have lots to sound off about. And there's nothing that irritates us more than the annoying, tedious and repetitive Christmas jingles and tunes we are confronted with wherever we go. Yes, it's time to be assaulted yet again by an excruciatingly dippy version of “It’s A Jingly Jangly Jolly Holy Holly Santa Snowy Sleigh Ride” or some such. It really is snow joke (sorry). Once I hear Noddy Holder dementedly screeching 'It's Christmas!', I want to perforate my eardrums with a hot needle.

But I never do, of course, because not all Christmas songs are totally naff. Let Santa Parsons give you an early Xmas present and point you in the direction of some festive musical fun that will make you forget the tuneless turkeys. You might just find your heart filling up with Christmas joy if you follow the link to the podcast called The Yule Log from Hell.

It's a compilation that comes out at this time of year of 'alternative' Christmas songs: some straight, some completely off-the-wall, some politically incorrect, some plain awful, some you would definitely not want your mother to hear but all of them infinitely preferable to Wham, Slade, Wizzard and their like. Take a look below at a few of the songs featured and think where else you could find them. Why not download them all and entertain your friends and family to around 10 hours of glee? I have and I will - so, visitors to Colinette Barn, you have been warned!

*  Ragin’ Cajun Redneck Christmas – Willie Robertson
*  It’s a Technicolor Christmas When You’re Jewish – Tommy and the Greyhounds
*  Please come home for Christmas - Etta James
*  Yes, Virginia. There is a Santa Claus - Burgess Merrideth
*  Santa Claus is Coming in a Whirly Bird - Pat Boone
*  Lumberjack Christmas/No One Can Save You From the Ghosts of Christmas Past - Sufjan Stevens
*  Santa Doesn't Come to the Little Jewish Kids Houses - The Yid Kids
*  Naughty, Naughty Children (Better Start Actin' Nice) - Grace Potter and the Nocturnals
*  Yah Dis Ist Ein Christmas Tree – Mel Blanc
*  I Saw Daddy Kissing Santa Claus - Kip Adotta
*  Give Me a Second Chance for Christmas – Mike Viola & the Candy Butchers
*  I Saw Three Ships - The Chieftans/Marianne Faithfull
*  Santa Claus is a Black Man - A.K.I.M. and the Teddy Vann Production Co